waking up early for school as usual, but the only difference is tat there's no nid to teach, with a simple reason, its CHILDREN's DAY...
well...was kinda late when i left home coz i had a hard time forcing myself to do my BIG biz...hahaha... anyway, met phyllis on the way n she's late as well, after a late nite outing with her friends, guess its becoz we dun hv to teach and tats y we can take our own sweet time...
nevertheless, we reach school on time n still get enuff time to prepare for celebration...
ermz...basically my main duty for the day is the Lower Primary Games... the game actually consists of 4 SHORT stations, each doing some basic form of either balancing technique or rolling technique...feedback from some teachers n kids were tat...ermz...not tat fun really...haha...but nvm, since i didnt plan the game...keke...
after tat, i went to my p6 class...was suppose to hv lesson but the both teachers of 6J & 6L wanted to lesson to themselves so good for me...i got an extra lesson free...hahaha...anyway, gave them their children's day gift den i ran off...they seem very satisfied with the gift, well, i think so too coz it looks really like expensive chocolates...yeaz~
ok after tat nua in the staffroom for awhile den go off to disturb my 2P...hahaha how can i let go of this opportunity to got hit Yiting's head...she is really a talkative yet disrespectful kid, but she's quite adorable...so really dunno 该爱还是恨...after a while i go ard looking for some p6 pupils coz i have some extra gifts for them...oh, instead of getting the p6 students, i got a bunch of p5 following me up to the staffroom...cant chase them off unless i give them some gifts...irritating eh?
after that i went for my relief duty...went under the sun again, watching soccer challenges between teachers n students...oh i participate in one game, but only play half a game...dun wan to get too tired...hahaha... next event is the kickboxing in the hall...well, interesting for the kids but its really hot in the hall...sweats actually roll down the face once in a while...haiz
hmm after tat is the prize presentation for the art competition held earlier in the day, ziling went thru my p3 paper2 withme during tat time, well, quite a bit to correct though, all thanks to out HOD...ok, aftertat is yeaz...END OF CELEBRATION!!! we had lunch in the AVA room...but it doesnt really taste nice...oh tats my only meal of the day also...cant imagine myself to survive with tat amount of food in my tiring day....helped rachel, phyllis n hwee min to pin up the 灯谜 for the evening Mid-Autum Festival Celebration, after that, phyllis went off to a dancing course and the rest of us retreat to the staffroom to do out stuff...
i did a bit of the amendments to the paper 2 den leave for raffles place to settle some stuff on the part time job last time...but really frustrated coz when i reached there at 3.10pm, i read a notice on the door that they will be out till 3.45pm...so i juz stroll ard raffles place in my t-shirt n short...really a lot of pple were looking at me lor...especially those working class...they look amazed lor...why? cannot wear t-shirt n short to CBD area meh? i went to lau pa sat to eat dessert (Red Ruby with sago) after tat...but tat is not nice coz the very kind auntie pour too much cocnut water...i only finish half...wat a waste...i went back to the office at 3.50pm and chop chop finish wateva i nid to finish den i left for the hospital to visit my grandma...
she's quite okie coz when i got there, the physio is there n told us the main doc will be there today to do a final checkup, and if ntg wrong, shld be coming home today...yea...but she gotta be very careful coz she cannot afford another fall so now we are looking into various form of precautions for her...stayed there till 6pm den i left for school for the Mid-Autum Festival...
Yea i know i will be late for sure but i dun care hahaha...well i got to sch at ard 7.45pm...well, kay told me she'll be there so actually i try to rush down lor...but still, im 45mins late...oh nvm tat...met up with kaylin n kayxon after i put down my bag in the staffroom...we had a short chat in the concourse den we disappear to enjoy aircon in the staffroom...hahaha...was chatting with kaylin and "abusing" kayxon which he seems to be enjoying a lot...hahaha...too bad it all comes to an end with their mum calling them to go off...well, nevertheless, its the best part of the night i guess...
help to bring some of the kids to walk ard the sch for a while den the night is over...yea...can go home liao...hahaha...oh my phone is totally flat and cant replied to a lot of pple...so sorry~~~
came home, bathe, do ntg for a while, den got a total knock out liao...hahaha...dun even hv time to come blog...nvm, i blog now on behalf instead...hahaha...
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9/30/2006 09:09:00 am
Wednesday, September 27, 2006
Life isn't always fair...there are plenty of things that's unfair...we knew it and we go through it everyday...all we have to do is just open our eyes and see...it happens in our daily life and in the daily experiences we accumualte...
Take for an example, taking a public transport...we all pay the same fare but do we get to enjoy the same priviledge? you see people standing pitifully and people sitting comfortably...isn't it suppose to be fair that if you n i pay the same price, we should be enjoying the same comfort? maybe you would say just eliminate the standing possibility by just having seats in the bus or mrt, or that remove all the seats to make it fair for all...but either way, there will not be fairness because by that time, our debation will not be on whether there is seat or not, it will be who has the most convenient way of getting off the bus or mrt...no matter what, we will not be seeing any fairness there...by the way, to add something, if someone who is twice the size of a normal man occupying a seat or two seats in this case when he/she boards the bus or mrt...will it be fair for someone like him/her to be occupying 2 seats as compared to others of only settled on their 1 seat? i know we cant blame them for growing so "huge", but its not fair for other people, especially when u have to share the seats with him/her, yahz, he/she will occupied 1.5 of it n u r left with half ur backside outside the seat...
Take love for another example...do u always get back as much as u put into a relationship? well, the answer comes from both ends...one is NO, coz u always put in much more than the other party, the other being YES, coz u belongs to the other party this time, putting in only adequate of affection but got that more than what u really deserved...does it goes to show that this someone love is not as pricey or valuable than the other one? or that love in the 1st place isnt juz about balancing the affection of 2 parties towards each other? we see out friends get hurt in relationship, but of course, we know everyone went into a relationship hoping for something good will turn out in the end, but we cannot forsee the future and sour relationship cannot be avoided, thus, we can see the possibility of failure in relationship...when u talk about fairness in a relationship, we will never be able to escape from the fact of whether its you treating me better, or that i treated u better than u do to me...when there is one party who isnt willing to commit further, the relationship comes to an end, and all thanks to the unfairness from the heart...
Our work is another very obvious unfairness where u will find frustration in...do u happen to find that u are working harder and longer hours than someone but in the end, u realise tat the someone is earning more and getting a promotion faster than u do? so does this goes to show being hardworking doesn't always help u in your career and all these are moving in the opposite direction of what our teachers who had been "preaching" us "muz study hard n be hardworking den u will earn a lot of money n have a good future"...yeaz all sounds like bullshit now rite? especially now that u are suffering after listening obediently to what ur dear teacher had told u...it doesn't pay to do so much if u dun work intelligently, so in the end, only the clever gets the better prospect...is it fair? so wat are the poorer n not so smart people living for? to be served as a form of amusement for the rest? then wats the point of living on? to make things worse, there are people who are best at licking the boots for their bosses, if u are not the very intelligent n yet u dunno such kinda ways to climb ur way up, wat's good is there in u? so if u are not good at doing this, it will be unfair to u in ur working career since u are lacking of a better skill to aid u...
There are plenty we can talk about...u can find it everywhere and anywhere...even when u are dead...u will be sent either to hell or heaven...it wldnt be fair to say only those who believe in someone will go to heaven...den wat good is heaven if it only open entry to certain pple? is this selfishness the so called greatness of a most important being ever existed? hahaha...even dying u cannot find fairness...since fairness doesn't seem to be existing, wats the point of insisting that there is fairness in life? why not we juz continue to live our life in unfairness since even if we try very hard, we wun get to see fairness in life...so...heck it...live ur life any selfish way u wan!
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Many times...the question of carrying on or quitting keeps coming to my mind...seriously, i always ask myself why am i doing all these even though there are times i really dread going to school...sometime i really wonder if my weak stomach has got anytg to do with this...yea, its some kind of sickness...dunno since when, teaching is no longer the thing tat i really wan to do, but if u ask me wat else do i wan to do, i really hv no idea at all, coz since young, beside thinking of being a soldier (hey, most guys hope to be one when they r young ok?), my only ambition in life is being a teacher...now tat im a full-fledged teacher...im dun hv the feeling of realising any dreamz...is it tat im being too idealistic with this job? or is it the passion has slowly died out through the years? nothing really makes me any happier anymore...im smiling but im not feeling the joy within...im complaining but it hurts whenever i pick any fault with the educational system...so wat is wrong? is it me or is it juz education is juz too big a thing for anyone but me to handle? im not looking to revamp the whole system...i juz wan to see i can make a bit of changes to the kids i like, passing on the knowledge i had and let them avoid the unnecessary route tat i had taken...i wan my kids to hv the best...even if he or she doesnt appreciate it at all...i went thru so much, and it will pain me to see them suffer wat i had gone thru...perhaps im being too idealistic, way out of the true meaning of education...however, its really a great feeling to see students doing well n tat they r moving on well...especially those who shared close link with...
when i saw victor n nicholas passing n moving on to sec sch...im actually happy for them...not bcoz i dun nid to see them in sch anymore but the fact tat they can move on to the next phase of their life...its a good sign coz its not like they are going to stay another in a place which they dun belong to anymore...slowly i see my 1st p6 mainstream students graduating...with superb result of cse...maurice, yann torng, vincent, xin ru, joanne, pei shan, siew hui, jeslyn etc...so many of u...im proud of everyone, even though i tried to bring all of u down, but deep inside, i admired all the burning desire of everyone of u to succeed in life...i dun mean to belittle anyone, but the fact of being critical to everyone is to build a strong character in everyone and i believe in tat one short year, everyone grows tremendouly, both mentally n intelligently...tat certainly contributes to the good result everyone attained in the end...all of u r the part of the reason y i carry on...
beside tat, i find it most heartwarming with the company of some of my favourite students in my short teaching life...kaylin, gwen, arlene, yihao, jiexun, maureen, suqi etc...i rem everyone n of coz, will rem for the rest of my life...my only regret is tat i did not take anyone of u as my graduating class...some of u whom i still keep contact is are the very reasons why i shld carry on...when i see all of u moving on, i will wan to push myself further as well...coz when i see u improving, i wan to improve myself somemore as well becoz its not juz teaching tat im doing now...its character building...i saw kaylin, someone who is often defiant when it comes studying chinese, although she is still defiant in studying tat, is trying her best to be a better students now...her goal is no simple goal, but to be the best n go for very very good result...it makes me feel good...coz when i see her, i see hope...she may not be the cleverest chinese student i hv, but certainly one tat i like to have in class...
watever it is...for now i will still hang on to the job for its u people who keeps me going...for how long? i hv no answer...lets juz hope for the best...
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Dread the day... Coz MSN both in office n at home are DOWN!!! What the heck??? Hmm... How i wish i can go online to chat now... Haiz... Guess its fate for me to rest early tonight... But im not entirely tired... Im wondering if i sleep early today and wake up tmr too early in the morning,,, Wat shld i do??? I dun wan to wake up n stone... I need to mark exam paper tmr... Though its ntg much for me... However given an option,,, I wld prefer to hv uninterrupted sleep... Isn't tat so much nicer than waking in the middle of the nite??? Anyway i think tat is enough,,, Looks like i hv no chance at all... Yeaz... No chance of sleeping late today... Hahaha~~~
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Fly up high 写着青春的日记 挥洒没有止境的汗水 为自己开创自己的道路 Fly up high 跳着活力的舞蹈 享受今天留下的回忆 为世界开拓不一样的道路 oh……Fly up high……
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9/05/2006 11:25:00 pm
"Your expectations are too high!!" Hey, i was blasted with this comment once more tonight... what the heck is this? what's wrong with asking for what u want n wat u like? i dun think im asking for too much... its just tat sometime u cannot really get what u wan... im a simple man asking for simplicity, well, in this case not simplicity in that puny brain some pple has got... ok be honest...im quite disturbed by that somebody who said tat... becoz of tiz, i think im going to redefine what i look for in my ideal love, coz i think wat i wan is actually found in different pple in my life, yeaz...if not they wun have a place in my life anyway... ok, i dun nid those "X" factor in the someone, well, who needs them if u r not going to use it to earn big bucks? wat i wan is juz someone comfortable to be with, well, not those who sticks day in day out of course, personal space is important, hopefully someone who will talk back once in a while, yea, not those who are total submissive one, i hate them...no character at all... oh appearance wise... hmm...the height n nice face muz be there of cse, hahaha, oh kay if u r reading this, u need a couple of inches more to pass the minimum standard, though u already scored As in the other areas...hahaha~~ actually, character is important, being different from other pple is not the decisive factor, afterall we takes after pple we think are of good role models, juz like me to some of you out there...hahahaa~~~ ok serious, its not easy to get 100% personality compatible, so wat im looking for is juz the minimum standard... well...we all try to look for wat we like, but sometime things juz dun happen the way we wans... however, if u dun try, there will never be a good ending for u... yahz wait lor...wait some more... u see wat u get in the end... hahaha... ok lah....im bored...im crapping... forget it....im juz wasting my time n wasting yours...hehehe~~~
(sorry to state ur name in there kay, as an apology, the font is in ur fave purple!!! sMiLeZ)
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Haiz...wanted to write something but dun really hv the mood to do so... so sianz...so bored with everything ard me... why is it that happiness cant be something that we can hold on to forever? sometime i really wonder the meaning of life... why is it we work n fight so hard juz to enjoy a moment of happiness? is it really worthwhile? seriously, i never tot working hard is anything enjoyable in the end... imagine spending so much time n effort finishing up something, by the end of it, u will be too tired to enjoy the joy out of it... so in the end, where do u get the happiness from? perhaps im talking nonsense again, yah, but cant help it, my life is only left with rubbish n shitty biz... well, i dun think im still good enuff to be a role model for anyone, since i've already lost the will to live, the eagerness to prove myself, and the hunger for success... im merely a walking corpse if u can imagine how it is like... occasionally i will wan to do something tat seems normal, which is like working hard, but it wun last, in the end, im still the dead man deep inside... im bored with life, bored with pple telling me this n tat... im afraid of home...the place surrounded by 4 walls... here, i see pple with anticpation of me doing smtg great, but i know its not wat i wan to do.. i only wan to live my life tiz way till the last... forget it whether its for myself or whoever, my life is set to be this way, and i think its the best ending for me tat i can hope for...
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